Online Dating Story: "I never thought I'd fall in love again."
By Brenda and Dwaine, North Point, Florida
Updated: Nov 23, 2009
Brenda's StoryBrenda,
32: I never saw myself doing this. I never thought of
myself being out in the
dating scene with
three kids. After nine years of marriage I became a widow. I lost my
husband and 5-year-old son in a boating accident. I had no immediate
family in my area. I wanted to get myself distracted and make friends.
It was more of a support system than dating, just to meet
people.
I live near Sarasota but I
decided to try my old zip code from Fort Lauderdale to see if I could
make new friends, because my parents live there. Then I found Dwaine.
185 miles apart! His photo was one of the first attractions. He seemed
like a laid-back, easygoing guy. I sent him an email, told him I went
to Fort Lauderdale often. For one week, we texted and emailed. Then, we
exchanged phone numbers. Three weeks later, we met.
First
date: Dating was all new to me, I wasn't sure how to behave. I thought,
just be me, this is who I am. I wore jeans and no makeup -- this is how
I'm going to be most of the time. We met at the clubhouse at his
apartment complex. He was the same person I spoke with on the phone. I
could tell he was for real, not trying to impress me.

He listened to me. It was like I
had known him for years, I felt
comfortable.
He listened to me. It was like I
had known him for years, I felt
comfortable.
He's
easy with children. That was important to me. I have three kids, he has
one. I was going to Fort Lauderdale every weekend, or he came up. We
introduced the children two weeks after meeting. They clicked
instantly. All four of them get along fine. Eight months later, we
moved in together. Quicker than I thought! We just want to be a big
family.
We married about one year after
dating
online. I said let's go to Vegas, it's going to be my last
time getting married! Just the two of us went, and the family and
children watched the ceremony live online. Then we came home and had a
reception with our friends and families.
I
gave Dwaine a gift to complete his dream. Dwaine was adopted by his
stepfather and had lost touch with his biological father. I located his
father with the help of his mother and invited him to our reception in
Florida to surprise Dwaine. Everyone kept the secret. When they met,
they were hugging and crying; it was very emotional.
I
never thought I'd fall in love again. Dwaine has been a blessing to me
and the kids. He's been a strong base to keep us together. He makes us
laugh and smile. I feel positive again about life.
Dwaine's StoryDwaine,
39: I received an email from Brenda at a time when I
was going to take a break from dating. She had no photo and not much
information in her profile. I said, it's only fair if I see a photo of
you. Once I saw her picture, I was immediately attracted to
her.
Actually she was the opposite of
what I was looking for! I was looking for someone who lived locally,
was closer to my age, and taller. She said, "I know I'm not exactly
what you're looking for," but talking to her, I was intrigued. We had a
lot in common. We both love the outdoors, spending time with kids and
family, working on the house. I was looking for someone who is their
own person.
It was a good three or four
months when we realized we didn't want to be without each other. I
never expected I'd be driving 2 1/2 hours away to see someone. If she
wasn't driving here, I was driving up there. I proposed to Brenda on
Christmas Eve at my friend's house. We were playing charades, guys vs.
girls. I acted it out: "Will you marry me?" I knelt down in front of
her with a ring and said it again. She was in a daze, she thought it
was part of the game.
I had spoken with
my biological father but had never met him. Two days before our
reception, I went out to meet Brenda in the car. I saw a gentleman on the
passenger side, I waved and whispered in her ear, "Who's that?" She said,
"Your father." I had no words. We immediately hugged. He cried and I
got a little teary-eyed. I wrote Brenda a poem and read it at the
reception, thanking her. I still talk to my dad, we talk every
day.
I was getting frustrated before
meeting Brenda -- thinking of taking time off from dating. When I got
her email I said, let me try one more time. I'm glad I did! I owe it
all to Yahoo! Personals.
Online Dating Tips from Brenda and Dwaine- Expand
your online dating searches
geographically. I found the love of my life 185 miles away.
- If
you do find someone far away, there are ways to make it work. Keep the
communication open. We wrote letters during the week and drove to see
each other when possible, even if for one hour only.
- Be
patient with a long-distance romance. There will be moments when you
think it's not working, but it can work.
- A relationship is like a job. The more time and energy you put into it, the more you get out of it.