Six Tips to Create a Better Online Dating Profile
By Dating Coach David Wygant
Updated: May 22, 2009
Over
10 years, I've been coaching people in all facets of
dating. This includes coaching people in how to date
online.
What I've learned and realized
about online dating is that to be truly successful, it's essential to
be able to create an amazing profile. Most men have no idea how to make
a good profile (a profile that grabs a woman's attention). A guy often
writes from a guy's point of view. So the profile does nothing to
convince her to contact him.
You need
to bring your dynamic personality into your online profile. Instead of
just writing "I'm an accountant and I love what I do," be more dynamic
and say something like "I have always loved crunching numbers, but I do
it creatively so no one gets in trouble with the IRS."
When
writing your profile, think about everything you're writing like a
conversation. If the "conversation" you're writing would be interesting
in person, then you've done a good job of profile writing. If not...
then you need to keep re-writing your profile.
With that in mind, here are my six essential keys to building a winning profile:
1.
Your profile must create emotions. Instead of writing
"I love to travel and see new places," try writing it this way:
"Traveling is my passion. Whenever I take a trip to another country, I
learn something new about myself and I appreciate my life even more.
When I was in Thailand checking out the Buddhist temples, I was able to
not only see history but feel history." What this does to a woman
reading this profile, is create an emotional attachment.
When
you write about your love of travel as a story, she can picture
visiting Thailand or traveling with you. If you just describe something
by putting it in a list, you're not going to create an emotional
attachment for her. Women are emotional beings, and they are the ones
who will be reading your profile. So

learn to create stories when describing
your passions
learn to create stories when describing
your passions.
2.
Don't say in your profile that "My friends say I'm a wonderful
person." I've seen men do that countless times. You
don't let women know you're great by telling them that your friends
think you're great. This doesn't tell a woman anything. She doesn't
know who your friends are, so you are better to talk about things you
love to do.
For instance, a client of
mine volunteers at a homeless shelter once a week. So in his profile he
wrote "Saturday is my favorite day of the week. I volunteer at the
local homeless shelter, and spend three hours helping others feel
better about themselves." Something like this shows a woman what type
of person you are... and that is what she wants to see.
3.
Don't tell women in your profile that you're funny -- show them why
you're funny. Women are attracted to humor. So get a
woman to laugh when she reads your profile, because your profile should
get her to feel like she's flirting with you in her head.
4.
Never say in your online profile how successful you
are. Women hate men who brag about themselves. It
actually turns them off. They are, however, extremely attracted to very
confident men. So instead of bragging about yourself, say something
like this: "I've worked really hard in my life to become who I am.
Every time I've fallen down, I've dusted myself off, checked out my
wounds, gotten up, and tried again. Being successful to me means having
the freedom to do what I want... which of course is having time to hang
out with you." By saying something like that, you're telling a woman
that you're successful but humble. You're also throwing a little bit of
humor in there which also helps.
5.
As for photos on your profile, they must be clear, up close, and
recent. Women need to see your eyes, so it's really
important that you are not wearing sunglasses in most (if not all) of
your photos. It's also essential that you choose pictures that show
your face and your body, so women can see what you look like
overall.
Your pictures are part of what
makes -- or can ruin -- a good profile. Your pictures should also help
to create a feeling of emotion inside a woman. Don't put up pictures on
your profile of you and your buddies drinking. Put up pictures that
show that you have interests in many activities other than alcohol
consumption. A woman wants to know you are fun and social, but she also
wants to be able to picture having a good time with you. Choosing a
picture of you biking in Italy, therefore, meets this desire. So look
through all your pictures and select ones that will paint a picture of
who you are as a person. This includes putting up photos of you in
different life situations.
For
instance, you may put up one picture of you in business attire, one
picture of you in play mode, and one picture of you with your dog.
Also, try to include clear photos that show you participating in your
favorite activities, such as hiking, biking, or playing
tennis.
Your pictures should show women
all the different sides of you, and the pictures of you that you put up
on your profile should represent who you are at this stage in your
life. So what I suggest is that you have a friend of yours take some
new photos of you. If you write a fantastic profile, but your pictures
don't match, a woman will be disappointed when she meets
you.
6. Be honest in
your profile! Many men will massage the truth in their
profile. The major problem that occurs when men are less than honest
occurs after you've gone out on a date with a woman. She will go back
after the date and re-read your profile to see if there are any
discrepancies. It's almost like she is looking to see if you're as real
as you appear to be. So make sure everything you write in your profile
is totally representative of who you are right now in your
life.
Your profile is designed to help
women form an opinion about you. Written correctly, your profile will
entice her to contact you immediately. Women re-read profiles over and
over again because they want to get to know who you are and they want
to get excited about meeting you. The more you put in your profile that
expresses your personality, the easier it is for a woman to decide to
email you because she'll have a better idea of what to talk about with
you.
Online dating is very competitive.
In order to stand out amongst the sea of men who are Online, you need
to invest the time necessary to create a great profile.
More David WygantDating coach, blogger and author
David Wygant has been featured on more than 2,000 radio and television shows including Dateline, CBS Good Morning, and MTV. Get more sex and dating tips on David's interactive blog at
davidwygant.com.